Day or night you can reach Cali Estes by phone at 1.800.706.0318 or leave us a voicemail.
Fill out the contact form below to have Cali come speak at your event.
Day or night you can reach Cali Estes by phone at 1.800.706.0318 or leave us a voicemail.
Fill out the contact form below to have Cali come speak at your event.
The Truth Shall Set You Free:
So Why Are You Still Lying?
9/6/2020 by Chris Cobb
How long have you been sober? No, seriously. Well I’ll give you the benefit of a doubt, but did you REALLY get a flat tire that lasted a week? Ok let’s make some sense here. I don’t know if you’ve been in sober living homes like I have, but whether or not you have, with all this sober time under your belt, are you working a program? If so, are you working it thoroughly? Applying its principles in ALL your affairs? Don’t feel too bad if you’re not a saint, no one is. Especially me. It took a LOT of work for me to really get the principles of the 12-step program I worked to actually show in my every day life. I was taught to be completely honest, transparent, if you will. But I also felt “Why do I have to tell everybody in this place every single detail of my personal life when they ask?” I personally believe that no matter the situation, we all need and deserve SOME degree of privacy and freedom to think for and to ourselves. But where do we draw the line? What boundaries are healthy, and which are not? Below, I’ll talk about some of the things I refused to share with the rooms (lie about), and some of the excuses / lies I heard from others. This is my personal experience within a recovery home, but can definitely relate, I’m sure, to many more situations in recovery. So, let’s get started.
Lie #1: Where You’ve Been:
Welcome to your new home. Filled with people just like you. Alcoholics and addicts. Fill out your papers, pick a bed, get to a meeting. You have 2 weeks to get a job so you can pay rent. This was, besides jail, where I wound up more than once in my life as a result of my will to keep drinking and the delusion that I could control it. If you’ve been in a place like this, I’m sure you know there are rules. You have to do chores, and you have a curfew. You get written up if you’re lazy or late. And what better than human nature to try to get us out of situations that aren’t working in our favor? We are adults, by the way. So, who’s to control us besides ourselves? The owner of the sober living home, that’s who. So, our nature is to lie. One of the seemingly easiest things to lie about is where we have been, since no one’s really watching us, right? When I was “awarded” my first 24-hour pass for having a job and paying my rent after 2 weeks, I decided to go visit “family”. But damn, I’ve also been lonely since my girl left me for drinking too much. Might as well get into my contacts… ope, wonder if Jane Doe’s home? Yep, she is. So, I go to “Jane’s” house. It was a great time! Oh shit, I’m 6 hours late getting back… Frantically, I think of the best excuse I can conjure. Ahh, flat tire, and car won’t start. Both at the same damn time. And I’m lucky to even have my license at this point, mind you. I’m too nervous to call “Jim” at the sober living, so I text him. “I’m sorry, my tire is flat and car won’t start. I don’t have money for a tow so my uncle Phil is coming to see if he can fix it”. And the reply I get back: “Oh yeah, how long ago did this happen, and why are you waiting until just now to tell me?” “Shit shit shit” I think to myself. So I rush back “home”, nervous as hell, and plan out what I’m going to say. But will they believe my uncle Phil who doesn’t even exist really came and fixed my car within minutes of me telling Jim?! I better stop and grab McDonald’s, get cigarettes and gas. I’m probably in trouble anyway. Basically, I just turned a mole hill into a mountain because I lied about one little thing. When I could have just said “I’m going to Jane’s.” And taken the late curfew extra chore and extra meeting “punishment”. But no, I allowed my deceptive human nature to get me in a pickle, now I have to explain a bunch of things I haven’t even had the time to make up yet. See where I’m going with this? Let’s get to that extra chore now. Read on.
Lie #2: Did You Do Your Chore?
Phew, they didn’t rip my head off about Mom’s house. I mean Jane’s. Or whichever one I told them. But they did assign me an extra chore and gave me 7 days restriction. Guess things could be worse, I’m sober so let’s face the music. Well, my chore was the damn toilets. Cleaning toilets after 20 other grown men who apparently don’t know how to shit, have shit and pissed in, on or around them. Fun times. Ok, not bad. I have to be at work by 7, so have to clean the toilets at 6. When I get home at 3, I don’t have to clean them again ‘til 8pm. Easy enough. 8pm to self: “This is bullshit. I go out one time and get punished when I did nothing wrong…” So, I do a half-assed job, or don’t do it at all. Looks clean enough, and don’t care about finding out if it smells clean enough, am I right? 8:30pm I get written up again. And I lie and argue until I’m red, blue, purple in the face. “I did my damn chore, you’re just here to be a dick and make sure I don’t make it!” So now I’m not only lying, I’m blaming others for my failure to do what I am supposed to be doing. Next house meeting is tomorrow, and I have to answer to Jim. Again. Is there a gun emoji? Disregard that question. Anyhow, I’m at the meeting the following morning, and low and behold, the almighty JIM looking at me with his ego and disgust. Yep. Another week restriction and it’s all Jim’s fault. Not only another week restriction, three extra meetings on top of the five that I already need each week… <angry emoji>. Time for a meeting!
Lie #3: How Many Meetings Have You Been to This Week?
Eight. I’ve been to eight meetings this week Jim. Now let me go see Ja.. Mom. Jim: “So who signed your sheet? There’s no Jane at the Men’s Action Group Meeting…” Ummm um she was filling in for Dave. I don’t know who Dave is. “So guess what, that’s strike 3 Mr. Cobb. You know what that means. You’re up for termination.” Damn. I only went to 2 meetings and spent the rest of the time with Jane. And I lied about everything. Now I get to sit in front of 20 other dudes and be in the hot seat, then have them vote me off the island or not. I grab my torch, ready to put out the flame. Luckily, Jim isn’t such a bad guy after all. Instead of kicking me out so I can go couch surfing, drinking, smoking, popping and snorting again and wind up dead or in jail… He gives me a 1,500 word essay on INTEGRITY. Doing the right thing, even when no one is watching. And it went like this: Okay I won’t make you read another 1,500 words, but you catch my drift. After some time, I came to learn that pretty much every time I told the truth when I fucked up, it was received much better than if I were to lie. I owned up to my mistakes, faced the music, and started truly learning from them. I didn’t want to go back to my old life, where I was prisoner in my own Hell. And if not only telling the truth, but also keeping my side of the street clean and simply doing what I’m supposed to, will keep me safe and sober, I might as well give this new idea a try. I know my old ideas certainly never worked. A lie is a lie no matter how big or small. But I still do believe that there are some things I can keep to myself. However, if I ever so choose to wind up in a sober living home again, I should probably keep my shit straight so I don’t have to make up stories that get me put back in the hotseat, or worse. There is a difference between a lie and a secret. The best advice I can give is to find that happy median, that balance. And no matter what this balance entails, let what you do or tell do NO HARM to others, or yourself. Mic drop. Act wisely, my friends.
Shaky Single Sobriety:
3 Signs You Need to Wait on A Relationship
8/28/2020 by Chris Cobb
It’s nice being sober. Sucks being single? Try considering the fact that if you are single right now, you have a zero percent success rate in every relationship you have ever been involved in, like me. Cold, hard truth. I’m not here to tell you what to do, but rather tell you from my experience why things haven’t quite worked for me yet with relationships, even with over 2 years of sobriety, step work, sponsorship, and so on. Here are some things I have noticed while still learning how to handle certain aspects of life while living it sober.
1: I Still Have Much Work to Do on ME.
Even though not quite as extreme, my irrational thinking and urge to be right are still there, even though I am no longer drinking. My reactions in handling situations is better, but still not as great as they could be with more work. Say when I was drinking, the person I was dating would be angry with me and give me the silent treatment. Back then, maybe I’d yell, throw something, punch walls, whatever. Now, I am much more reserved with my emotions. However, I still build up resentment, wanting to pry out of others what they are thinking even if they don’t wish to talk about it at the time. I become frustrated, angry, unreasonable, and make petty threats to leave, even though I know I do not want to go anywhere. This will usually have the majority of the same end results as before, minus the night in the drunk tank or the broken dishes and windows. Working a 12-Step program helps, yes, but: the principles take time for us to truly apply in our daily lives. YEARS of drinking, and learning how to react within a horrible place in our heads took time too. Bad things add up over time, they become second nature to us. But, so do the good things. There is nothing wrong with going out on dates, or even being in a relationship after some time, but just remember: things will not always work how we wanted them to. The best thing we can avoid doing is setting expectations on another person to avoid resenting them and being overly disappointed. Rather than dwelling on an ended relationship, use it as a learning experience so that you can keep improving. Use the things the other person claims to have not liked about you, as self-improvement advice rather than going on the defense, feeling insulted, and using it as fuel for your angry former mindset to overtake.
2: Is My Life Yet as Together as The Other Person’s?
How many jobs have we lost due to our alcoholism? How many times have we been arrested because of our erratic behavior under the influence? Do we even have our driver’s license back yet? What about the person we’re interested in? Are our standards higher than they used to be for our Dream Date? If they are, are our standards for OURSELVES higher than before? To put it in perspective: think of you as me. I’m thinking of my dream girl. She is kind, caring, generous, never misses work, keeps up her appearance and loves to relax to dinner and a movie when there is free time floating around. But what about me? In the beginning of my sobriety, I had a dishwashing job at Denny’s, a clunker of a car (now I have a different clunker), and I lived in a sober living house with a bunch of guys just like me. Broken, afraid of what the future holds or doesn’t hold, and a chip on my shoulder. Even after 2 years, I am not where I want to be. I am getting there, slowly, but surely (I wonder if her name will be Shirley). Sure, I go out on dates, and sometimes the fact that I am a videographer, social media marketer, and I.T. guy (taking girlfriend applications), interests the other person. But this is skill, not yet a career. I struggle with bills, I struggle to keep my car running, and I struggle to find a place to take my date that won’t burn a hole in my right ass pocket. I’m not a loser by any means, and neither are you. The biggest way we can humble ourselves here is to just be honest with the other person. As long as we are putting in what footwork it takes to get where we want to be in life, this person will either accept or deny our company. We HAVE to accept this. Life is too short for small talk, so walk the walk, and see where you end up. Stop holding yourself back because of one little date gone wrong. There are plenty of fish in the sea that have the same common goals and ethics. Keep moving those feet!
3: Am I Safe Around “Normies”?
I know one thing I can’t do. And that’s drink. But who am I to judge anyone else who drinks, that has never had a negative event occur as a result of their one or two here and there? Does my new spouse drink a glass of wine or have a beer with dinner every now and then? How do I feel about it if so? And finally, how long will I be okay with it before one bad day gets my hand around a bottle? I’ve dated a few that do drink, while remaining sober myself. One situation bothered me, when there was the drunken laughing loving state my partner was in that I couldn’t go with the flow about. I didn’t feel the same as her, and I felt as if though the nice things she was saying about her and I being together were not quite true, because I had only heard them while she was drinking. Another situation that didn’t bother me, was the relationship where my spouse had a glass of wine on occasion, and acted no different with than without said glass of wine. Either of these situations, whether negative or positive feeling come about, may or may not be still dangerous for me or you. We simply have to remember where we came from, why we stopped drinking in the first place, and whether or not we can handle the pressure, if any. Not only with spouse, but around family. Friends. Keep yourself in check.
In closing, I’d say overall, it’s never a bad thing to enjoy the company of another in life. As long as the other person enjoys ours as well, and we feel as safe as they do. The most important thing to do in any relationship is to keep open communication, especially those of us who have struggled with alcoholism, we have to set healthy boundaries. And remember: nothing, and no one, can put that drink in your system but YOU. Date safely my friends.
Nothin’ but Net:
Three Signs You Might Be an Online Addict
9/4/2020 by Chris Cobb
There are obviously many types of addictions; From drugs and alcohol, to sex, gambling, food, and so on. There is one addiction that I believe affects more of the world’s population than any other, even though it is seemingly harmless to most. Internet / technology addiction. It is very similar to any other addiction for the simple fact that no one really likes to admit or even realize that they are losing sleep, work, and time with loved ones over it. So, I’m going to talk about a few things below that I have noticed on my own account (pun intended), that have impacted my life in different ways. So, let’s get to it.
Sign #1: Posting Your Every Emotion to Your Wall
I’m sure we’ve all done it at least once or 100 times before, I’m guilty as well. The dreaded cryptic shit post that no one really understands. “Some mfers gon’ see wasup next”, or “The feeling is mutual” as a post?? Yeah, I remember my first attention begging post too. When everyone comments “What’s going on, are you okay!?” and the like, when in reality, you probably won’t say much else about the “situation” even if asked. They don’t even always have to be encrypted with catchy phrases; you could say something like “my mom stopped paying my phone bill so I’m dropping outta school” <insert crying emoji>. But WHY? Why post these things that are on our mind every 5 seconds of our day, just to constantly unlock our phone every time it dings to see who liked, hearted, or commented on it? Is it because Facebook asks “What’s on your mind?”? Awfully nosey social network if you ask me (hence the ads popping up involving things you’ve talked about around your phone). I have writer’s block right now. I think I’ll post that to Facebook. Ok I’m back, sorry, got distracted. So anyway, what are you like in REAL LIFE? Do you just blurt things out in public when the thought so much as tickles the surface of your brain, or do you think before you say or act? I’ve come to learn that not many people care about my overly dramatic emphasis on how depressed cutting onions makes me, so I’ve managed to keep my cool over the past couple years with my social presence. I am still, however, addicted to memes. Let’s move on and read some more.
Sign #2: Playing Doctor
I’ll admit it. I’m not a real doctor, but I play one online. Who needs WebMD when you have “Friends”? (I am a YouTube certified auto mechanic, but that’s for another time). So, you see a friend (or friend of friend)’s post about their constant migraines that Ibuprofen won’t help. After telling them to take Ibuprofen and it doesn’t work, your diagnostic session is completed and you finally have the remedy! Another comment. “Oh, do you drink diet coke? Aspartame is the cause of your migraines. Stop drinking diet coke or stop complaining. I’m just trying to help; I can’t help you unless you want to do what I’m suggesting”. Congratulations on saving the day (or not). If you’re like me, I’m the kinda person that coughs for 2 days, looks up the type of cough I might or might not have on WebMD and gets depressed because I have fake cancer. So, who am I to judge others for drinking Diet Coke?? How about that good ‘ol pro bono Facebook therapist talk? You see someone’s cryptic shit post “I just don’t understand”, and reply something along the lines of “Well, you will likely face less of this issue (whatever it is), if you would look in the mirror every morning and say ‘I am a powerful, positive, successful human being’, let me know how that goes and we will continue”. Or tell this person to stop drinking Diet Coke (last time, promise).
Sign #3: Validating Your Own Opinion on Others’ Posts (Trolling)
It’s usually towards complete strangers. We for some reason unknown, tend to see some random post whether it be political, revolving around a game system or a show, and cannot seem to just pass it up without intervening somehow. I remember when I was a keyboard warrior trolling other keyboard warriors. But when someone posts that Playstation 4 is beast and PC gamers are pussies, I’m not leaving that be. This actually happened a good 15 years ago, but an argument over game consoles turned into some kid talking about my mama, to me being so pissed I’m shaking and typing insults back as fast as the eye can see. I might have been drunk but who’s to say. So, do you talk shit about Dr. Cali Estes on your website like some of her biggest fans? Do you twist things out of proportion until they are completely made up so that you can gain the following you are so jealous over (just admit it)? Well if you do, you might be a troll, and internet addict, an attention whore. So as a Facebook Certified Doctor, I URGE you to get off your phone, off your ass, and look at the grass and sky for five minutes, just to make sure you’re alive. I’m about to do the same, after I post my blog to get your attention. If you’re still reading this, I’m praying for you.
PTSD, or post-traumatic stress disorder, is a serious condition that affects many people around the world. Unfortunately, some of the people experiencing PTSD are teenagers, who can be severely affected by incidents happening in their young lives.
Post-traumatic stree disorder occurs when someone is triggered by something that reminds them of a traumatic event. When we experience trauma, the amygdala is activated. This part of the brain is commonly associated with fear and other stress responses, and it initiates the “fight, flight, or freeze” response in the face of danger, stress, or trauma.
Typically, after a dangerous or stressful event is over, our brain goes back to normal. However, when someone is experiencing PTSD, it means that their amygdala hasn’t gone back to normal. Rather, it remains on high alert and will react with a stress response to anything that reminds them of the original traumatic incident.
Teenagers may be particularly vulnerable to traumatic events. In fact, there are many mental health facilities that treat only teens due to the fact that they often require specialized care. Because their brains are still developing, a traumatic event can potentially cause high levels of stress, anxiety, and fear that may be difficult to overcome. While this is the case for some adults as well, teens may be particularly susceptible to PTSD. In this article, we will discuss what causes PTSD in teens and the ways in which they are affected by it.
Any kind of traumatic event can result in PTSD. Anytime someone is confronted with a severely traumatic event in their life, there is a chance that they will have lasting consequences as a result. Some events that may cause PTSD to develop are:
When PTSD occurs, there are many signs and signals apparent, some more obvious than others. Some of the signs to watch out for when you suspect the teen in your life is experiencing PTSD are:
PTSD is a very complex condition. Some teens who experience trauma may even require life-long treatment in order to deal with their recurring memories and triggers. However, certain treatment options have been found to be highly effective. If you suspect the teen in your life is dealing with PTSD, the most important first step is to sit down and ask them about how they’re feeling. It’s possible that your teen may resist this approach, but it’s important to let them know that you’re there to listen and help in any way you can.
After you’ve spoken with your teen about how they’re feeling, it’s crucial that you get them in to see a qualified mental health professional. This may mean a therapist, a psychiatrist, a counselor, or a psychologist. Ideally, look for a professional who specializes in PTSD treatment. There are many options that a mental health professional can offer to your teen when it comes to their treatment.
A mental health professional skilled in PTSD treatment will help your teen to find coping skills that will assist them when they’re triggered by memories of their traumatic experience. Additionally, they will work to build up their self-image and their outlook on the world. Furthermore, they will seek to calm the symptoms that come along with PTSD, such a stress, anxiety, depression, and isolation.
If you believe the teen in your life may be suffering from PTSD, don’t wait to get help. PTSD is likely to get worse over time if left untreated, and the negative effects can bleed into every aspect of your teen’s life as they grow. Remember that it’s important to not judge your teen based on their symptoms, even if they are frustrating or confusing to you. Instead, take the time to sit down and talk to your teen, letting them know that you support them fully and are there to help. Additionally, always make sure to reach out to a qualified mental health professional in order to ensure that your teen is receiving the care they need.
When we think of the catastrophic results of addiction, we usually think of a heroin addict injecting his entire inheritance, or a cocaine addict snorting his most prized sports car. We may even let our minds imagine a struggling alcoholic drinking himself to death and losing his place to live. We rarely think of someone losing everything they have built from youth to adulthood by not being able to control their sex life. Well, I am here to tell you today that sex addiction can be just as catastrophic and destructive as any other active addiction. Sex addiction has run rampant in society for centuries and leaving a path of destruction behind. People lose their marriages, their families, their jobs and even their freedom all in the name of sex. And nowhere has it been more abundant than in professional sports.
Athletes in all realms of professional sports certainly have their fair share of sex addicts. And the national football league is the front runner for sex addiction and the destruction that it leaves behind. If you remember one of our stories from two years ago, a talented coach for the Miami Dolphins threw his entire career away with that team by yes, sex addiction to local strippers and his cocaine addiction. But the latest evidence of sex addiction in the NFL is a story that is almost as comical as it is sad. Let me clarify myself by saying that there is nothing funny about a man that has the potential to lose everything he has worked for because of his sex addiction, but the circumstances that led to this incident are as strange and amusing as they are sad. This week, the Seattle Seahawks cut rookie defensive player Kemah Siverand for trying to sneak a female into the team hotel that was strictly forbidden due to the potential spread of COVID-19. All players were given specific instructions that no one other than team employees and players were to be admitted into the hotel until further notice.
Mr. Siverand risked his entire career by dressing his female companion up into Seattle Seahawks gear all the while trying to sneak her into the team hotel for the evening. Team officials quickly noticed that one Seattle Seahawk player in particular had extremely nice curves and features. This player looked too good to be a male Seattle Seahawks defender, and it was soon discovered that under shoulder pads and helmet was a gorgeous 5-foot 6-inch female waiting to get to the players’ hotel. As funny and strange as the circumstances are, it shows just how far sex addicts will go to quench their cravings. Much like a heroin addict risks taking his last breath with each injection, this NFL player knew that if his actions were discovered, his playing days would be over. He put everything on the line to get laid to be perfectly honest and it backfired in the worst way.
Siverand was cut by the team the following day and has not been picked up by another team. Everything he worked for from the time he was a child is gone at this point and is going to be next to impossible to regain. He did not care about his teammates and the risk of them catching this virus that could have potentially wiped out the entire Seattle Seahawks football team. And that is going to be hard for any other franchise or coach to look past when considering him for employment. His career is most likely over, his dreams of becoming a top NFL player and a very wealthy man have gone up in flames, and all in the name of sex! We here at The Addictions Coach deal with sex addiction as well as all other addictions and are just a phone call or an email away from getting you the help that you need and deserve. Don’t be like this NFL player and let your active addiction take everything that you have worked your entire life to gain. You can call us at 1-800-706-0318 or head to our company website at https://theaddictionscoach.com Contact us today!
Dr. Cali Estes is a featured expert in UPJOURNEY, discussing narcissistic behavior. Click the link to the full article below.
Dr. Cali Estes, PhD
Psychologist | Cognitive Behavioral Therapist | Celebrity Addiction Specialist | Founder, The Addictions Coach
You need to think of a narcissist as a predator. They need to win, be in control, and conquer the objective (in this sense, person). They look at a no-contact boundary as a challenge and will try to overcome it as much as possible
They may dip out for a bit and get distracted by another conquest (in this case, a person) and still return to you.
Most narcissistic personalities will have one specific target that they can not take no for an answer from. This is the person that they may tell, “you will never leave me, no one else can have you, I will kill you before I let you leave, or I will kill myself.“
If you have broken the chains of a narcissistic personality and feel free, they may come back after the “no contact” period is up (can be a restraining order or you cut them off completely).
A good example of this is Jodi Arias. Travis cut her off, moved and she drove through multiple states to get to him, when he rejected her yet again, she killed him and left. She had to win and decided that no one else could have him.
Dr. Cali specializes in dealing with narcissistic behaviors. Call the elite team at The Addictions Coach at 1.800.706.0318 ext 1 to speak with someone on our team.
Digital Conflict, Social Media Mayhem:
Doomsurfing and Doomscrolling
8/6/2020 by Chris Cobb
During sickness, crisis, boredom, even when we are fine: There lies one addiction that affects the majority of the population, and not many even see it. It’s around every corner, on your counter, nightstand, in your car, even in your bed. This addiction like many others, does not discriminate. It’s a worldwide epidemic. And the scariest part; it’s perfectly legal (for the most part). If you’re reading this, you’re already in its grip. Technology. Internet. Phones, Smart TVs, Computers, DOOMSURFING. So, what is Doomsurfing and how do you know you are a victim? Better yet, how do we control it? Below are some signs I’ve recognized in my own surfing and scrolling behaviors and how I’m able to control them, at least for some time, so I can get my real work done.
Red Flag #1: You’re losing sleep over it.
It started with social media. All the way back to Myspace (when Myspace was still cool), now Facebook. Doomscrolling. Have you ever (yes) been scrolling Facebook for so long, seeing the same things in your newsfeed over and over, and lost track of time completely? I certainly can say I have. I have made the excuse that I can’t sleep, so I need to occupy my mind. But let’s do some real talk here. I couldn’t sleep because I couldn’t stop scrolling Facebook. Seeing what my friends are doing when I know they’re done posting for the day, looking to see who liked, loved, or laughed at my post, seeing who’s become single overnight so I can do nothing more than heart their profile picture knowing there will not be any kind of follow-up message. Yeah, I’m weird, but so are you. So how do we fix it? How do we become more well-rested without Nyquil, without melatonin, drugs, alcohol; without attempting to cure one addiction with another? Well, keep reading and I’ll tell you how I’ve worked on this very issue, after discussing some more warning signs.
Red Flag #2: You aren’t performing well at work because of it.
One cause for poor performance at work is lack of sleep. We talked about that. But what if you’re sleeping just fine, and doing your browsing at work, on the clock, way too often? Again, we can lose track of time, train of thought, and get behind at work. I personally remember managers shouting at me to get off my phone before they take it from me on plenty of occasions. Some places, such as those who follow certain HIPAA guidelines don’t allow phones at all, yet we still sneak them just to find out if Epstein killed himself or not (too soon? #SorryNotSorry), risking our jobs. We’ll talk solutions here shortly, but let’s look at just one more sign that you or a loved one is addicted to Doom. I mean browsing. Onward!
Red Flag #3: It’s negatively impacting a relationship.
“It’s not you, it’s Facebook.” Did I say that right? Anyway… I’ve done it, she’s done it, you’ve probably done it too. Say you’re in a relationship and when you guys first join forces, you talk about how much you LOOOVEE cuddling while watching a movie. But you fail to mention you do it with your phone more often than a person. I’ve put significant others in fairly bad moods for being on my phone too much, whether during a movie or while they’re talking to me about their hopes and dreams of a brighter future. I’ve also been a hypocrite and lashed out over the other person being on their device when we are supposed to be “spending quality time together”. This is a tough one, especially if you work on it, because you can’t really force the other person to do the same, if they have the same issue.
So how do we work on this problem we have that’s negatively affecting our lives? There are a ton of things that can help, here are just a couple that seemed to help me quite a bit.
Sleep – Mute your phone, put it on a dresser or desk across the room, instead of in bed or on the nightstand next to you. This lack of motivation to get up and move will decrease the temptation to drool on your phone, and will help more than you could imagine. Meditation, melatonin, try a few different natural remedies for a better night’s sleep. Most importantly, stay away from tech when you are supposed to be getting some rest. CLEAR YOUR MIND.
Work – How did you sleep? Well, I hope. Did setting the phone across the room force you to get up and move in order to dismiss your alarm? Very nice. Now get some coffee and breakfast. Stay off your phone while doing so. You need to focus in order to get your brain working, and avoid thinking about Epstein and Covid-19 all day at work, since you won’t be on your phone all day at work, RIGHT!? Practice, practice, practice. When you sit at the table for dinner, say you have 4 kids and a spouse eating with you. Kids tend to talk all at the same time, and interrupt you and your spouse while you’re trying to talk about the lovely amount of bills coming in this month. You get worked up, distracted, frustrated because you can’t even hear yourself think. Well the same thing goes with distracting YOURSELF at WORK. Stay off your phone and focus on the task at hand, and I guarantee you and your boss will see a huge difference in your work performance. You might even get that promotion to Plane Captain you’ve been waiting for! (please don’t attempt to fly a plane, while on your phone.) Just a bit left to read.
Relationships – I’m no couples’ counselor, but I’ve experience relationships gone bad plenty of times. And one reason I’ve been in arguments is, believe it or not, screen time. So even if your significant other has the same Doomsurfing addiction as you, maybe you could lead by example? Get off your phone and listen. Spend time, don’t waste it. You can get on your phone in so many other places and situations. What’s more important: Feeding into Fake News or Creating Real Moments in Time? Take a break. Hang with your kiddos. Go take some pictures of squirrels in abandoned water parks (shhh). Do it together.
In closing: I’m still totally addicted to technology and the 99% of BS it shows me. I’m also an I.T. guy who works from home, from: you guessed it, my computer. I can’t be saved, but maybe you CAN. Try taking the doom out of doomsurfing. Just keep yourself in check and ask yourself: “don’t I have something more important to take care of first?” Godspeed my friends.
If this sounds like you or a loved one, you are not alone! We can help. Call the elite team at The Addictions Coach today.
1.800.706.0318 ext 2
Covid-19 has caused a lot of issues globally. Businesses that people spent a lifetime building have closed for good. Politicians are using Covid 19 to push their own agendas. Covid-19 has led to a lot of death, destruction and chaos but there is one category in life where this disease has really had a negative impact and this is in the world of addiction. Recovering addicts all over the world have relapsed due to conditions and circumstances of Covid-19. Addictions have started because of Covid-19 with many people turning to drugs and alcohol for the first time due to the issues brought on by Covid 19.
So let’s take a few moments and go over the 4 main reasons why Covid-19 is causing a major spike in addiction.
So as you can see, Covid-19 can blindside us and lead us right back to our deadly addiction if we aren’t mentally tough enough to withstand all the negative consequences that this dreadful disease can and will bring our way. So if you are a recovering addict who has been hit hard by the negative circumstances of Covid-19 or maybe this disease has led you to drugs and alcohol in order to deal with the circumstances that this disease has brought to your life, there is help and support out there for you! We here at The Addictions Coach have the addictions industry’s best professional recovery coaches to help you deal with all the negative circumstances and triggers that Covid-19 had brought your way. You can get the information you need to hire one of our top professional recovery coaches by heading to our company website at Top Recovery Coaches and Life Coaching for Drug and Alcohol Addiction or by calling us at 1-800-706-0318. DONT find yourself dealing with Covid-19 alone. Call us today!
Dr. Cali Estes, The Addictions Coach and founder of The Addictions Academy, confirmed she has been invited to join the Board of Advisors for the NüCure Naturals company. NüCure works closely with charities, universities, and research labs, helping them to use natural, organic compounds with medicinal properties and strategically combine them to create a synergistic effect, greater than that of each individual ingredient.
This process allows the creation of products free of the harmful side effects associated with pharmaceutical drugs, while simultaneously treating more specific medical needs than current market offerings.
NüCure founder, James Bennett states, “NüCure has created a symbiotic management team that shares intrinsic values and rituals. As such, all members of the NüCure Naturals team have a passion for personal growth and self-betterment. Dr. Estes is a perfect fit, we all share the same passions.”
“We are thrilled to have Dr. Estes as an Advisory Board Member and we welcome her with open arms. I value her business experience and insight along with her passion for natural healing. We’ve already made some amazing progress!” Bennett exclaimed.
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